HappyComeLucky

I have shown you how much I love giving cunnilingus in The Lick of Love. Giving has always brought me pure pleasure. The first time I did was one of those moments which was a real awakening for me.

The first time was my clumsiest. I had no idea what I was doing. I had never had someone go down on me and I hadn’t seen or read any scenes that would help me. Luckily, through communication, I learnt very quickly what she liked and the responses that I could elicit from her.

To be honest, until my current relationship, the number of times that I had received oral sex hadn’t broken double figures. I was intrigued by whether it could feel amazing, but most of the time, it wasn’t something I thought about.

During my marriage, it is easy to explain why my clit remained a tongue free zone – my Ex didn’t like doing it. I know ‘doing it’ is not the most romantic, sexual or sensual turn of phrase, but it does some up the whole mood of how it would have happened.

So, what about the rest. I have never expressed an ambivalence to others who I have had sex with. I know that some of them are reported to be skillful with their tongues and enthusiastic in their love of cunnilingus, and yet it hasn’t featured in our activities.

Reading the Kink of the Week posts on cunnilingus provoked some reflective thinking on why that might be. I think some of it is down to me. I don’t use any sex act as a bargaining tool or for currency for other acts. I have written about my love of cock and there is no way that I would take the advice of withholding cock sucking until I get oral – advice that I have heard and seen in many places which just makes me so sad about the manipulative approach to what should be consensual pleasure.

So, what about when I am with someone who enjoys going down on a woman? Again, I think that it is more about me than them. I am, very lustfully, actively seeking cock. I adore touching, tasting, and feeling it. I love being very actively involved in sex and like my mouth to be busy whether it is with kissing, sucking, or any other option. I don’t ask people to go down on me, I don’t open my legs and lie back to invite them. I don’t avoid it either, but it isn’t part of my normal repertoire, so I don’t give any verbal or nonverbal invitations to initiate it.

I shake my head at myself that I have had such a different attitude towards giving and receiving. I know the joys of oral from giving but had not learnt the joys of receiving. That is changing now. I am definitely more of a convert now.

My man can make an absolute mess of me when he goes down on me. He knows exactly what makes my body respond and uses that knowledge like any sadist would. He can bring me to the point of needing to come while forbidding me to, then using his tongue, mouth and teeth to force those orgasms from my body. I used to equate the feeling of a tongue on my vulva as deeply sensual, now I know that it can be, but it can also be so much more.

So, how do I feel about receiving? It still isn’t something that I ask for (I am very rubbish at asking for anything), but I know how dynamic and powerful it can be. Truthfully, I think the time is right for me now in a way that it wasn’t when I was younger. Direct clitoral stimulation wasn’t pleasurable for me until the last couple of years. My go-to masturbation technique has always involved deep grinding pressure – something a tongue and mouth can’t replicate – but now that my clit does like to play, oral sex can make my day.